My five happy things for this week are: 1. Dog cuddles. I was at my parents house and while I struggled a bit with my family and 💯 remember why I moved out in the first place it was good to see the pets. 2. I went on a date with my partner for the … Continue reading 5 Happy things 5.11.17
If it was that easy I would be there. I know in my brain that logically it isn't my fault. But in my heart, I still feel every day that it is my fault. That I am to blame, that because my foolish heart thought it would be worth it more than once, that because … Continue reading Forgive yourself
5 happy things is back. Long story short I was very low, very busy an generally a bit overwhelmed by life in General. I have started University and moved house twice in less than two months as I had a very poor experience in the first flat I was in. I was also dealing with … Continue reading 5 happy things is back
#22daysofhope Who they are: Emmet David Arnold-Peirson, our little flame; and the reason this project exists. He is also the reason why I have met so many of you amazing loss parents. He left us 22nd October 2016 and was due 22nd June 2017. He is our first, and so far only child. Missing him … Continue reading Who They are
On the 21st my partner came up to visit me at uni and we could be together for the 22nd. We stood looking at the window (admiring our handiwork as we have covered my window with static plastic wrap that looks like stained glass and gives some privacy) I have finally bought a frame for … Continue reading What’s in a name?
I have been doing this for 25 weeks, not consecutively as was the plan but still. 25 weeks of honouring what has made me happy is a good thing. This weeks hapoy things are: 1. Butterflies 2. Yesterday evening I went to a BBQ and cuddled a 9 week old, deaf Dalmatian puppy called Luna. … Continue reading 5 happy things 25
This isn't really my story, it's my partners, as it was his dream. But here I am writing about it so I guess you'll just have to hear it from me second hand as it were. He told me this morning as I woke up (very slowly, he is a morning person- I am not) … Continue reading Sandcastles and dinosar wellies
Future. Today I found out that I have a new niece (well my partner does, but we've been together so long I'm claiming Auntage). Skye was born today. Happy birthday to the new human. She has her whole future in front of her, I know I am biased but she is adorable. Definitely looks like … Continue reading Day 31. Future #MWAH2017
Hello. This is just to say that Emmet's dad will now also start posting blogs. So watch out for 'emmetsdad' in addition to my normal blogs. Love and Support Always, Surviving Miscarriage Together (Emmets mum) xx
This is how we parent. This is how we love. This is our life after loss.
22nd June 2017. #ForeverLoved Balloon Project photographs! If you would like to be included next year, please comment and names/dates you would like remembered, and contact details (email only please) if you would like a photographic copy of your babies name. Please note that it could be a while after June 22nd 2018 that you recieve your photos, as we are a two person team, who both have busy schedules, especially if we beat our target of 400 names for next year!
I was surprised to find beauty today amongst this weeks crazy, but I did and here it is.
Yesterday my Partner and I had a long emotional talk. This week is a shit storm already. Whoop de do, we both have exams and our lost baby would be due. Great... Yesterday I asked my Partner if it was totally stupid that I think of he and Emmet as my boys. Even though we could never know their gender. Turns out he thinks pretty the same way I do about them and so I was Happy/Sad crying half the night. He thinks of them as a tiny boy playing in the living room with plastic dinosaurs.
Monday. Monday the 19th June, in three days I thought we would be meeting our baby. Instead my partner and I are in survival mode. I asked him if he was okay and he said no. Obviously I then felt like a total dumbass for asking. Of course he's not. I'm not. The world is not … Continue reading Fisrst day of the week we never wanted to come.
Today's prompt is Friend. (Yesterday got away from me and I wasn't able to finish this blog post, so here it is on the 18th instead.) Friend. I lost a best friend in the time between now and last october, I also gained friendships, and worked out who is really going to be there for me when the shit hits the fan.
This one seems pretty apt today, I did plenty of crying yesterday, and my fair share today too.
Todays prompt is colour. I think of lots of colours when I think of Emmet. Pink, white, grey, orange, blue, yellow, green. The colours of hope, of love and grief, of my pain and joy.
Today's prompt is wound. Some days it does feel like I'm wounded. Other days now I feel better. Slowly I am recovering and more able to take each day as it comes.