Personal

I speak out because I need people to understand that baby loss is not just something that happens.
It is personal, inescapable, and you participate in that process, in that grief for every day after it happens until the day you die. I am not finding that my grief has lessened. It has grown both easier to carry and harder to bear. Every day you learn how to cope and every day you are faced with more milestones and should have beens and could have beens. Every day I grieve more for what we have lost together, as a family, and yet, it also gets easier. It is a paradox, it is both easier to go in every day and find a new normal, and yet, grief seems to be amplified by every milestone left forever un-reached.

To which camp do I belong? 

So where do I fit? I don't really fit with the infirtility crowd that I mix with in this crazy club that is the baby loss community. My inability to have kids is not an inability to or a difficuly in achieveing pregnancy (although the success of such a venture is there to be debated... … Continue reading To which camp do I belong?