I don't really feel very hopeful at the moment. Actually all I feel is empty and numb and sad. I sometimes feel a bit disassociated with my life. Like there is now way this is happening. Time is not moving on, I can't keep up with it. I feel just a bit 'outside' all the … Continue reading Hopeful?
We're now at what would have been the 20 weeks point. We would have ultrasound pictures and know what their gender would have been. We'd have been able to feel them move for a while. At this stage they look human, not like a blob of cells. I look at images of babies in the … Continue reading Who I’ve been
A little somthing for the fathers. Christian/faith based sentiment. Still sweet.
Morrison's baby section, lovingly placed opposite the self service till which I frequent regularly now interups what used to be a calming and enjoyable lunchtime sabbatical. When I'm getting my lunch it never fails to find new ways of stabbing me in the tender spot where my heart is still trying to stitch itself back … Continue reading Dinosaur hat
I don't believe in heaven Yet still I talk to you I think that you can hear me, I hope that it is true. You are my precious baby. I'll love you all my life, Though we never got to hold you, and the pain cuts like a knife. Talking makes it less like I … Continue reading Family tree
The feeling of panic I get when I think that I may never have kids is difficult to explain. All my life I have planned for children; the 'Kids rooms' and 'Child care' boards on pinterest didn't start with the positive pregnancy test, nor did the obsession with babies and children. I love them, I … Continue reading Rising panic
While my pregnancy may not have made a baby, it did make a mother. I became a mother as soon as I suspected I was pregnant, the test just confirmed what I knew in my heart. From that moment, dispite the rising panic, I felt this huge surge of love that I could never have … Continue reading Thoughts after miscarriage
I will be posting hourly for anyone who needs the support. Feel free to get in contact at this difficult time of year. We are with you. Surviving Miscarriage Together.
I am apparently a glutton for self punishment. I didn't used to think I was, but time is proving otherwise. I found, and still find, that it can be all to easy to fall into unhealthy habbits when you're at your lowest. Picking at the wound so that it doesn't heal is one way of … Continue reading The baby isles: Avoiding things after miscarriage.
Updated playlist I find music very comforting, and a valuable emotional release. I find it easier to cope with music. Here are some songs I have found that I found really helpful during and after my miscarriage. * means the song contains religious content, so you can avoid it if this is an issue for … Continue reading Playlist Surviving Miscarriage Together
http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/support/marking-your-loss/lights-of-love-tree/lights-of-love-tree-2016/ Many thanks to the miscarriage association for including our submission.
The mariposa trust -sayinggoodbye.org Are offering hourly posts on Christmas day over Facebook to help those coping with grief.
Tomorrow will mark two months after loosing Emmet.
I found that I was and sometimes still am really anxious after my miscarriage. I was low, I hated being around people. And the stress, grief, hopelesness and uselesness I felt in the immidiate aftermath especially was a toxic combination. During the first few weeks I hated my body, I felt useless, I hated life … Continue reading My emotional journey
I find music very comforting, and a valuable emotional release. I find it easier to cope with music. Here are some songs I have found that I found really helpful during and after my miscarriage. * means the song contains religious content, so you can avoid it if this is an issue for you. I … Continue reading Playlist. Surviving Miscarriage Together